The first thing most people notice is the absurd amount they spend eating out. They assume it’s a mistake. They recheck the numbers. They swear at their computers. Then they start bringing lunch to work.

That’s right. Money management software doesn’t just track where money goes. It all but forces users to spend smarter. And it’s finally easy enough for ordinary people to use.

Money management software such as Intuit’s Quicken hit the market decades ago and promised to revolutionize personal financial planning. There was just one problem: The early software was maddeningly cumbersome. Recording a single check took longer than balancing a week’s worth of checks by hand.

Things are different today.

New competitors, some based online, have sprung up to challenge Quicken and Microsoft Money with innovative features. For example, modern software can import transaction information directly from your bank, brokerage and credit card company. That’s right: no more manual entries.

“The easier we make it, the more users we’ll get, and that’s good for everyone. Americans really need help tracking their money,” said Donna Wells, chief financial officer of the Web-based program Mint.

Restaurants and bars aren’t the only surprisingly expensive habits. Some people notice that their innocent coffee habit costs several hundred dollars a year. Others find they could pay a small mortgage with the money they spend on shoes.

Money management software also leads many people to rethink their financial relationships.

“Our software detects how much interest you get from your bank and how much you pay to your credit card. Then it looks for better offers,” Wells said. “The difference comes to hundreds of dollars a year.”

Many new users limit themselves to informal changes. If, say, you’re overspending at restaurants, you might stop ordering appetizers. If that doesn’t cut your bills enough, you might substitute water for soda. Other folks set budgets.

Historically, money management software made budgeting difficult. Not only did users have to enter expenses, they also had to classify each one. The only thing the software did was add the numbers quickly.

These days, programs automatically import and characterize expenses. The only thing users do is set limits.

Web-based programs let users check their budgets via cellphone before making a big purchase. If users exceed their budget in any category, the software sends out e-mail or text messages instantly.

Some say the convenience of Web-based services — which also are called account aggregators — comes at the cost of security. And how much, really, can software improve a user’s financial position? “We only have anecdotal evidence from consumers, not hard data,” said Melanie Flanigan, a spokeswoman for Yodlee, a company that serves both consumers and other financial programs that manages about 10 million accounts.. “We are starting to do more analysis and surveys, so we will, over time, have more data behind this.”

Even academics confess themselves puzzled.

“We can’t tell whether these programs appeal to people who wouldn’t otherwise track their finances or whether they just make life easier for people who would track their money no matter what,” said Conrad Ciccotello, director of personal financial planning programs at Georgia State University.

In his gut, however, Ciccotello suspects software provides real benefits.

“For the final project in one of my classes, students must prepare a detailed financial plan for themselves,” he said. “The ones who use some kind of software always get it done in half the time, and they do much better work.”

The software

Web-based software:

• Mint.com

• Yodlee.com

• Buxfer.com

• Geezeo.com

• Wesabe.com

• Quicken Online

Mint.com generally gets the highest marks because it offers a lot of features, and it’s easy to use. Geezeo.com and Wesabe.com try to stand out by combining financial management and social networking. Users who fall into a specific group — say, cash-strapped, single 20-somethings — can join groups designed for their demographic and share ideas for saving money. (All are free except for the online version of Quicken, which costs $3 a month.)

Desktop-based:

• Quicken 2009 Deluxe Edition ($80)

• Money Plus Home and Business ($70)

• SplashMoney ($30)

Critics have generally given roughly equal marks to Quicken and Money. That may change since Microsoft has stopped providing annual updates for Money while Intuit keeps rolling out new features for Quicken. Also, keep in mind that Money won’t work on Macs and it’s no longer available in stores; you have to download it from the Web.SplashMoney lacks many of the features that come with the deluxe versions of Quicken and Money. However, critics tend to praise its ease-of-use, along with versions of the software developed for smart phones.