“Plowy McPlowface” “The Queen of Slush” “Forgot your street, again” “Driveway barricade creation device” “Driven by snowplow parent”

Those are names to kindle your brain for a contest to name the city of Bend’s snowplows!

The first thing we must confess is: There is no official contest.

And the second thing we must confess: We did not come up with this idea. It is kind of stolen, actually. We overheard news reporters and editors at The Bulletin joking about it, as they were discussing the plans for the city’s new app to track the snowplows.

In fact, we recall City Editor Julie Johnson suggested Plowy McPlowface or something quite similar. And then we swiped the idea for this editorial.

And the third thing we must confess is that the city of Bend might not be interested in a contest. It might be impractical to put names on snowplows. The city has used contractors to supplement plowing streets. We are fairly certain the contracts do not include a provision for affixing Plowy McPlowface on the side of a company’s truck.

All that said, if city government can’t be fun, that’s no fun.

So if you have names for Bend’s snowplows, send them in by email at letters@bendbulletin.com. We are confident you can do better than our suggestions.

We will dutifully forward them on to Mayor Melanie Kebler, who most certainly has a good sense of humor. We may test her, though, with a blizzard of snowplow names filling up her email for a contest that does not exist.