Seven not so scary movies for Halloween

Published 1:45 pm Wednesday, October 28, 2020

I hate being scared. To that end, I’m not a huge fan of horror in general. Tell me a good ghost story and I’ll have to sleep with a light on for a week. So on Halloween it’s always tricky navigating just the right amount of spooky that won’t inhibit my sleep schedule.

But films that strike that perfect balance of non-terror and either humor or compelling storytelling exist. Here are a few of the somewhat scary, or scary adjacent, movies to watch if you typically dive under the covers when things get frightening.

The Cabin in the Woods (2011) — The horror-comedy from uber-nerd producer and co-writer Joss Whedon and director/co-writer Drew Goddard brings all the elements of typical horror movies and spins it into a clever new package. All of the standard horrific scenes and images don’t seem too scary when more of the underlying force behind all the ghoulish deeds comes to life. When five college friends rent a predictably creepy cabin in the woods, one by one they begin to get picked off by nefarious forces. The film includes an early comedic contender for Chris Hemsworth who has been proving he’s a great comic actor trapped in an action star’s body. Stream it on Hulu or Amazon Prime or rent it from Google Play, iTunes, Vudu or YouTube.

Happy Death Day (2017) — Not so scary that you won’t be able to sleep at night, but with just enough for your horror-loving friends to enjoy it too. It follows college student Tree (Jessica Rothe) from the moment she wakes up in nice guy Carter’s (Israel Broussard) dorm room, then spends the rest of the day being pretty awful to everyone around her until she is suddenly killed. She then wakes up in Crater’s dorm room, repeating the same day again. In a more clear cut horror version of “Groundhog Day” (though when you think about it, the plot of “Groundhog Day” is pretty horrific) it takes the slasher movie and adds a lot of laughs. Stream it on Hulu Live TV or rent it from Amazon Prime, Google Play, iTunes or Vudu.

Jennifer’s Body (2009) — This severely underrated horror movie isn’t traditionally scary unless you have been in an incredibly co-dependent friendship with someone, and there are some gross flesh-eating and bile-vomiting scenes that may make you queasy, but it doesn’t take away from the original story by super-hip writer of the day Diablo Cody (“Juno”) centered around cheerleader Jennifer (Megan Fox) and her bookish BFF Needy (Amanda Seyfried). After a concert, Jennifer ends up possessed and craving human flesh. Meanwhile, Needy figures out what’s happening and tries to put a stop to it all. It’s funny and finally getting the recognition that it deserves. Stream it on Starz or rent it from Amazon Prime, Google Play, iTunes, Vudu or YouTube.

Let the Right One In (2008) — The Swedish original is far superior to the American remake “Let Me In” of the adaptation of the 2004 novel by John Ajvide Lindqvist about a bullied 12-year-old boy (Kare Hedebrant) who befriends a vampire named Eli (Lina Leandersson). With the traditional horror lines toned down in favor of the friendship between the two and the darker elements of humanity, it is much less scary and more compelling than other straight vampire movies. Stream it on Kanopy or Hulu or rent it from Amazon Prime, Google Play, Vudu or YouTube.

Tremors (1990) — Campy and hoaky, but it never takes itself too seriously and offers a dash of sci-fi horror to give you chills, but not nightmares. Kevin Bacon stars as Val alongside Fred Ward as Burt, two handymen in the tiny community of Perfection, Nevada fed up with their lives and on their way out. But fate puts them in the paths of underground cryptids that follow the vibrations in the earth to seek out prey, which includes both livestock and humans. Val and Burt along with colorful locals band together to save each other and make their way to safety before the Graboids pull them under. The film sparked five follow-ups (the most recent releasing on Netflix last week) of decreasing quality and increasing ridiculousness, but nothing can beat the first. Rent it from Google Play, iTunes, or Vudu.

Warm Bodies (2013) — When a plague ravages the planet and leaves the population split between humans and zombies, one of the shuffling, brain-hungry creatures, named R (Nicholas Hoult), falls in love with the still-beating-hearted Julie (Teresa Palmer). The horror-comedy take on “Romeo and Juliet,” based on a novel of the same name by Isaac Marion, is cute and quirky romance that quickly faded from the limelight after its release, but it’s worth revisiting for a Halloween treat. Stream it on Hulu with Live TV or rent it from Amazon Prime, Google Play, iTunes, Vudu or YouTube.

What We Do in the Shadows (2015) — I will always recommend this movie and its subsequent TV show. The mockumentary-style film centers around a group of four vampire housemates in New Zealand as they cope with modern life and prepare for the annual Unholy Masquerade for others in the local undead population of Wellington. The show takes the vampires to Staten Island, New York, and adds in more of a storyline with one vampire’s familiar, Guillermo (Harvey Guillen), taking a main role as he desperately waits to be bitten by his master. Both are hilarious, with the series getting better with the second season and worth a weekend binge. Stream the film on Kanopy or rent it from Google Play, iTunes, Vudu or YouTube. Stream the TV series on Hulu.

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