How lovely … it’s spring. The sun is shining, the sky is blue and all is well — until I hear, what’s that?

Rat-a-tat-tat. It sounds like jackhammers going off around my house.

Spring indeed is here, and for me that means the flickers and pygmy nuthatches are back in force as they loudly peck holes in the stucco exterior of my home.

We’ve seen the foot-tall northern flickers (they’re in the woodpecker family), but the birds that are doing the most damage this spring are the 4-inch pygmy nuthatches.

When I say damage, I don’t mean a hole or two in the stucco (where they also peck out the insulation); I mean dozens of holes around the eaves of our home. It’s not a harmless prank, either; a couple of summers ago we had the holes repaired and the area repainted, and it was quite costly. This time, there are a lot more holes to be repaired; the house is beginning to look like Swiss cheese.

This do-it-yourself story isn’t on stucco repair, but rather how to get rid of pesky, nuisance birds.

Fight wildlife with (domesticated) wildlife?

My first course of action was to put Ella Bella the dog out to scare the birds with her barking and yelping. But my 12-pound dog was not terribly scary to the birds.

The nuthatches were not deterred at all. I believe they mockingly laughed at her (I heard Woody Woodpecker’s annoying laugh echoing in my mind). Then to add insult to injury, I swear they started dive-bombing her. She took refuge under the patio table on the deck.

“I don’t doubt the nuthatches would do that,” says Wild Birds Unlimited store owner Kevin Lair. “They are trying to protect their nests, and the dog, even a small one, is seen as a threat.”

But obviously, not threatening enough.

Rat-a-tat-tat. Nuthatches 1, Dog 0.

Before I begin to tell you about our other tactics to get the birds from pecking at our house, I want to put a disclaimer out here that normally I am a bird lover. I have little pottery bird statues in my home and garden. I put out a birdbath in my yard. We have birdhouses everywhere, and we donate to The Nature Conservancy. My son even volunteered with the raptors at the High Desert Museum for years. But watching dozens of holes develop in my home, I’m left wondering: Where are those raptors when you need them?

Raptors in the sky

Occasionally, I do see the raptors — eagles, osprey and red-tailed hawks — flying by our home. And these birds, especially the hawks, would be a deterrent to the pesky nuthatches. Unfortunately, the raptors never stick around long enough. So I did the next best thing, or so I thought …

I ordered an owl statue for our deck, and I bought the hawk kites on the Internet that are supposed to mimic a flying hawk.

The flickers and the nuthatches aren’t totally bird-brained. They figured out pretty quickly the owl wasn’t moving, and the hawk kites just became a tangled mess. Now the pesky birds just land on the owl’s head, often defecating on it.

Going rogue

I didn’t want to go down this road, but the next suggestion I came across on the Internet was a slingshot. (If you do an Internet search for getting rid of pesky birds, there are millions of hits, so I know we weren’t the only ones with this problem.)

I kid you not — we bought a professional slingshot. We’re not bird killers; we just wanted to scare them away from the house, and we didn’t use the metal pellets that came with this slingshot. We used expired fish oil capsules as our ammo.

If you’re going rogue, you should be a good shot.

We were not.

Not a single bird was hit with a fish oil capsule, much to our 15-year-old daughter’s relief, who protested, “The birds were here first.”

She does have a point, and, Lair the bird-store owner, who also holds a master’s degree in wildlife biology, highlighted the fact that these migratory birds are federally protected species. We also learned about this strict federal law when I called our Terminix man, who informed us that Terminix doesn’t deal with birds.

Lair wrote a paper on minimizing flicker damage, which can be found on the Wild Birds Unlimited website.

“With spring and early summer, birds begin the process of raising families, and normally flickers and nuthatches would build their nests in dead trees, but as we encroach and build homes in their areas, there aren’t too many dead trees around,” said Lair.

As Lair continued, I started to feel very guilty. “These two types of birds are excavating cavities in your home for nesting or roosting, because they can’t find the dead trees or snags anymore. Unfortunately, wood siding, hardiplank and stucco are viewed by these birds as suitable surfaces to excavate.”

The mating call

Lair also points out that not all the pecking we’re waking up to every day at 6 a.m. is excavation work. It’s actually called drumming, which is a series of rapid, machine-gun-like volleys.

“The flicker is very territorial, and they like to broadcast their territory with the drumming. They also like to make a lot of noise to say, ‘We’re eligible, strong males,’” explained Lair. “The drumming isn’t usually what damages homes, as they often search out surfaces like metal gutters, chimney tops or wooden shingles that resound nicely.”

Judging from the sounds that resonate from our home, it’s a virtual singles bar for flickers.

Next deterrent

We went back to the Internet drawing board. We bought a high-pitched electronic machine called “Bird X Transonic,” which supposedly sends out a high frequency pitch that will deter the birds from pecking at our house. We were hopeful.

Results: The birds didn’t even notice the sound; apparently my 15-year-old is the only one who can hear it, and it deters her from going out on the deck.

“There’s a lot of misinformation on the Internet about birds and what is going to work,” said Lair.

I think he’s right. A certain website even sells a fake alligator head as a bird deterrent. That must be for birds that live in Florida.

Speaking of Florida, even NASA has had its flicker problem. In 1995, the space shuttle Discovery had to delay its launch because flickers had excavated some of the foam insulation of the shuttle’s external propellant tank.

More nonlethal methods

We tried stringing together old CDs and DVDs, which is supposed to scare the birds. This tactic lasted only one day.

“I think what you may want to try is putting a sheet or some kind of barrier between the exterior walls of your home and the holes,” suggested Lair. “You need to be able to discourage them from excavating holes in your home and have them go to the bird houses.”

I pointed out to him that I live on Awbrey Butte, the neighborhood that attracted national media attention a few years back because hanging laundry to dry outside is against the covenants, conditions and restrictions. I don’t think the neighbors would take too kindly to us draping the house in sheets.

But then again, I’m getting the feeling that the neighbors may not like seeing me outside clanging pots and pans to scare off the birds. Yes, thwacking pots and pans with a big wooden spoon is another trick I read about on the Internet. The sound does drive away the birds, but I get the sneaking suspicion I’m getting the reputation as the crazy neighbor lady again as I bang away. For the record, I wait till 9 a.m. to start the banging, unlike the birds, which start as soon as the sun rises.

Feline fixation

I’ve read a lot of blogs about the bird problem, and there are experienced people out there who swear by getting a cat. The problem supposedly disappears. But sadly, some of the bloggers admit that the cats can’t discriminate between a pygmy nuthatch and a nice songbird.

“I don’t think that works,” said Lair, who also owns an indoor cat. “Where are the birds excavating? They’re up near the eaves, and I don’t think cats are going to be able to get up that high. It’s inaccessible to them. But cats do kill tens of millions of birds each year; it’s a disservice to wildlife to keep cats outdoors.”

If you can’t beat them, help them

“The pygmy nuthatches are bold little birds,” said Lair, who seemed sympathetic to my plight after I showed him photos of the holes around my house. “What you need to do is to provide an alternative for them. First step: You need to deter them, or prevent access to the stucco. I think the Mylar windsocks will help. Step two: Provide them with boxes (birdhouses) for the nuthatches. The entrance hole should be 11⁄8 inch to not more than 1½ inches in diameter. Entrance size is important; they’ve done research on it.”

Nothing makes Lair happier than seeing a live streaming video of a nesting pair of eagles with their eaglets, which is on the big flat screen on the wall of his well-appointed store.

I buy some Mylar windsocks from him, which I dutifully hang around the house.

I try to make sure my birdhouses look welcoming. I have the birdbath filled with water again. But I don’t put out the bird feeders yet, even though Lair assures me the birds aren’t excavating for food, only for their nests.

The obvious question

I look around our home, and we’re surrounded by trees, and I wonder why the offending birds don’t fly to the trees and make a home in one of the hundreds of trees in the neighborhood?

“Healthy trees are too hard to excavate,” said Lair. “A dead tree is softer to carve out a hole, and because wood siding or stucco walls have a hollow sound, the flicker and the pygmy nuthatch think it may be a suitable nesting place.”

Because finding dead trees to nest in is getting more challenging, the pygmy nuthatch’s numbers have dwindled dramatically, and in Colorado, they are now a Colorado species of special concern, which usually precedes becoming a candidate for the endangered species list.

Interlopers: the swallows

Just when I thought I might be able to make friends with the pygmy nuthatches and the flickers, I showed Lair another photo on my phone. He identified these birds as swallows.

“Well, swallows are opportunists. They are what we call secondary cavity dwellers, meaning they don’t excavate themselves, but if a pygmy nuthatch has done the work for them, and the hole isn’t being used, the swallows will be the secondary cavity nester,” said Lair.

The first thing that comes to my mind are the swallows of San Juan Capistrano, famed because they return to the old California mission every spring.

My mind was racing. Are these birds going to return every spring to nest in my home’s exterior walls?

“Yes, the chicks may return to the area to nest the next year,” said Lair. “Not necessarily your home, but they could return to the vicinity.”

There are days I feel like Tippi Hedren in Alfred Hitchcock’s horror movie “The Birds,” as the pygmy nuthatches seem to get more emboldened every day.

But I’m remaining optimistic. And so far the mylar windsocks seem to be working when the wind is blowing. Also the mating season and excavation nesting season are generally only during the spring and early summer months.

“Yes, you may feel under siege, but you can’t take it personally,” said Lair. “Those pygmy nuthatches are sassy little guys.”

Don’t I know it?

Rat-a-tat-tat.

— Reporter: pnakamura@bendbulletin.com